Friday, March 31, 2006

Tie Day: Vacation Edition

I'm leaving on a jet plane tomorrow, because, I, like the Senators, feel entitled to a fortnight of vacation this spring. Unfortunately, it is not the plane pictured here, but you can't have everything. In honor of my departure, I chose a very special vacation-related tie.

The Tie: An alternating, repeating pattern of a cartoonish aerial view of Nantucket Island, location of one of JK's vacation homes, and a frolicking cartoon whale. It's called "Nantucket Isle and Whale."

The color: Blue. It comes in many colors, but, as you can see, the Senator likes it in light blue. Let the swooning begin.

The designer: Vineyard Vines. Who else?

Shown here during: The press stakeout outside the White House, following the signing legislation to put a Rosa Parks statue in the Capital. Also seen on Face the Nation.

Ranking: I can't imagine that I'll ever figure out how to rank these. Personally, I have no feeling about Nantucket, having never been there, so I'm ambivalent about that aspect of the design. I do, however, appreciate the non-threatening depiction of one of the world's largest mammals. I can tell you, though, if real whales splish-splash so close to actual Nantucket, I am NEVER going there on vacation. Speaking of which...

Stupid Democrafty Nickname for Future Reference: ...thanks to this post, I'll always think of this as the Vacation Tie. Not that anyone would wear a tie on vacation. I just find the imagery symbolic.

If you see John Kerry wearing this tie: Hmm, not sure. My instinct is to instruct everyone to state that they're not only fine with those pics of the Senator windsurfing, but those pictures were fine. As in, you know, um, foxy. But since that might be uncomfortable for, oh, ANYONE, you could always serenade him with "Vacation" by the GoGos. That would hardly be annoying at all!

What we think Tim Gunn would say about this one: Vineyard Vines AGAIN? To which I would say, "Screw you, Tim Gunn." Harsh words, I know, for America's favorite professor/reality tv star, but geez, Tim. I mean, if it ain't broke...

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Feeding the Fandom: Peanut Butter and Jelly

There's so much to love about the work week. The endless news cycle. Live coverage of the Senate proceedings. The Colbert Report and The Ed Schultz Show. But as the work week ends, certain things do become a bit tired - and I'm not talking about Senate aides.

If you're a brown bagger - and why wouldn't you be? - you know how tough it is to keep your midday meal exciting and nutritious. But if you're a Kerry fan - and why wouldn't you be? - you need to keep your strength up for long stretches of bird-doggin'. And, if you're a Kerry fan, you probably already know that all it takes for JK to rock the Senate, or the campaign trail, is a near-endless supply of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

I am not a regular eater of the PB&J, but then, I'm also not in elementary school, so there you have it. But if the magic combination of Lent-friendly protein, sugar, and carbs are what provide the Senator with his endless energy, it may be worth some reconsideration. And since we at the We Love John Kerry blog are nothing if not thorough, and because you already know how a bill becomes a law, here are some easy instructions for how a few ingredients become the Official We Love John Kerry sandwich:

1. If you are having any impure thoughts after reading "Kerry Sandwich," remember this is a family blog. Get your mind out of the gutter.

2. Procure two pieces of bread. Whole wheat will do, but flax is lovely - and yes,
you will probably have to keep a supply with you. I personally like this kind. A little toasting will get rid of the sponginess, but then, if you are traveling the country by bus, you may not have access to a toaster. (There are reasons I don't run for office.)

3. Spread peanut butter on one slice of bread. JK apparently likes Skippy, THK likes peanut power butter, and Democrafty likes Trader Joe's Organic, though nobody asked the latter.

4. Spread jam on the other slice. See if you can get some of THK's
1987 vintage. Or make your own with some berries. Homemade jam is awesome.

5. Put the two slices of bread together.

6. See if you can get Marvin to come over and
lick the knife. Use the same knife to cut the sandwich down the middle. No fancy triangles needed.

Serve without celery.

8. See if you can get the Senator to show it off.